Praying through troubling times and trials...

I received some devastating news yesterday... It shook me right to my very core.  And it's just one trial in a series that has been coming at my soul to unravel me outright.  

But my faith will be unshaken.  

The only way I can be confident of such is a constant connection with God.  I knew the instant I got the news that it was too much for me to carry.  And though I wept in an emotional breakdown when it hit me, I immediately turned to prayer...  Yesterday, then later in the afternoon, again in the evening and overnight in the wee hours... And still I continue.  It has been and will remain a constant turning over.  

This is how I prayed this morning... I share here that it may be a blessing or encouragement to some passerby:

"Lord, Lord, I am such a mess.  This moment - so many emotions, so many questions, so much uncertainty.  But I know it is You who holds my future.  And Your plans for me are greater than what is currently in front of me.  I know You will use even this to draw me nearer to You.  To strip away my security in this world even as we speak.  I know it is You who upholds me.  

And in the face of these giants, I will keep my hope in You.  I will rest in Your embrace, not striving of my own to keep up.  Knowing the battle is the Lord's and not my own - I need but be still and know - know You, Your presence surrounding me, Your Spirit indwelling me.  

In my utter weakness, Your strength and power are made and shown to be perfect.  Let You and all You are shine through my life now, in this troubled time, and always.  Less of me increasingly, and all the more of You.  

Ever more, call me to Yourself in the midst and let my faith be unshaken, an immovable trust in who I know You to be and Your unending, flawless love for me.  

I will take refuge in You, my God - I will find my comfort in Your peace and the power of Your mighty name.  When my mind wanders and my flesh falters, I will breathe the name of Jesus and focus on my sweet Savior and His overwhelming grace.  I will pause and let His mercies sweep and overtake me - wherever I am, whatever situation.  

I will keep turning this over to You, my Papa God, by the Spirit guiding me.  He will remind me when I grow weary to exhale and lean all the more into You. 

Let me now feel the warmth of Your good and kind embrace.  You anoint my head with oil as Your chosen one.  I am Your precious daughter, Your beloved, Your treasure.  I am highly favored and Your grace goes before me in all things and prepares Your way for me.  Surely Your great goodness and mercy chase me down constantly.  

I am flooded with reminders of how You love me.  I lift mine eyes to You - You are my great Redeemer, my Deliverer - and You provide all just as I need.  

I praise You for You are most faithful, and Your word unchanging is always true.  You are my God, and my confidence rests solely and entirely in You. 

Your will for my life, I ask You; lead me along Your way.  In Jesus' name, Amen."